Another night and drunk again. Good times. This means I have an obligation to write something I will probably regret when sober. Wait... sober? The condition nearly forgotten in my wine-ridden bourgois life, anyway.

There is this whole idea of 'pathetic gays' vs. 'decent gays', which I usually employ when thinking about the gay community. The category of 'pathetic gays' is extremely broad and obviously subjective. There I generally 'dump' all gay guys I personally would never date.

You can agree or disagree. In my opinion, the pathetic gays are:

1. 'Doubters': those who doubt their sexual orientation. They are usually miserable, and I feel sorry for them. However, both we and they know that it was them who created this state of misery for themselves. No one else. You shouldn't doubt - you should go and try. If you like it, better for you and welcome to the club! If you don't - well, then, you are straight (or asexual or really messed up). Doubting who you are is not an excuse not to have sex and therefore suffer when you are young. Try, talk to your friends, be open to new things. You deserve to be happy!

2. 'Self-deniers': those who know they are gay but deny it to themselves. Important: they do not deny it to the others - this is absolutely fine, we live in a homophobic society and some of us have to hide our sexuality in order to survive - but deny it to themselves. Self-denial is a sort of crime against nature. Again, there are certain excuses: for example, when raised in a very religious family, or with very homophobic parents. But even then... However, I also feel sorry for self-deniers and admit there may be special cases and that some of them really need help. 'Doubters' and 'self-deniers' have a potential to become 'decent gays' with time as long as they overcome themselves and embrace the awesomeness (=gayness).

As for the next sub-categories, I do not feel sorry for them at all.

3. 'Whiners': those who cry after every relationship of theirs is over. Crying per se is fine. Crying for weeks/months, making your friends listen to your sobbing, feeling sorry for yourself, engaging in self-torturing is not fine. Most certainly not. Again, I strongly agree that sometimes ending a beautiful relationship is hard. Here I speak about people who are whining after every single relationship they had. This kind of behaviour is by no means limited to gays: among straight men and women it is probably even more common.

4 'Photo fetishists': those who collect other guys' pictures having dubious intentions in mind. The outbreak of this psychological abnormality is especially acutely felt on www.gay.lv. Collecting guys' pictures? Seriously? You feel so bad about your own looks that you have to collect gorgeous pictures of the others? You can't meet a guy in real life and get laid, so you stare at someone's pictures instead? Seriously?

5.'Creepy interrogators': those who ask embarrassing questions on the first date. Questions, which are very strange and even more so disturbing. Like, what kind of gay porn do you prefer? Or whether Indian penises are more beautiful than the Chinese ones? (I knooow, how weird. Am I lucky on attracting freaks? Apparently so.) My most bizarre experience in this respect have been talking to a Jewish Orthodox guy who was interrogating me on the first date regarding whether I ever thought of being circumcised, whether I though Jewish guys were great in bed and whether I (God forbid) had sex with Arab guys? Weirdos, listen up: not everyone is as creepy as you, date human beings similar to yourself (= psychologically deflected) and leave the 'decent gays' alone!

Haha, this is fun.

To be continued.

5 September 2009