Just thought I'd make a quick blog entry.
Appearances are deceitful. We all know this, and yet usually we tend to believe that we can 'read' a person just by looking at him/her. A guy with a wicked smile should be avoided; a girl who is blushing must be really nice and virtuous; two kids kissing each other on the cheek must be innocent. True. However, it is not always the case.
I was quite surprised recently.
There are those two guys whom I know who behave like complete and utter 'village whores'. Seriously. They go to a gay club or a regular night club and dance like sluts: semi-undressing each other, making out (more like eating each other's faces), throwing each other towards the wall and performing a sort of 'wall rape'. They don't care other people are watching. They embrace their inner impulses. By no means I am judging them. I may be even admiring them for living their lives like they want. I do not approve but everyone is entitled to self-expression.
They both are 18. You would assume that behaving like this (one of them made out with 5 guys in one evening), they should be sleeping around. That they would have no problem having sex with other guys, slutting it up and trying all kinds of new things. Right?
Well... it turned out that both of them are still virgins. They never had anything serious with a guy. They are sluts on the dance floor. They had a chance to have sex many times. They don't. I don't really know their reasoning: whether they are looking for the 'right one' to try it first with, or whether they are actually petrified of the idea of gay sex, feel insecure and hide their frustration behind this aggressive dancing and flirting (but not taking it to the next stage).
I think it's strange.
Anyway, there is another guy. He is the most camp person I've seen in my life! Incredibly flamboyant. His voice, manners, clothes, music he listens to, face - everything immediately reveals he must be gay. He is very open about his sexuality - he flirts with boys all the time. However, he turns out to be asexual! Or so it seems. He never had sex, and nor does he discusses relationships or anything mildly personal. I would understand if he was shy and deep in a closet. But he is one of the most openly gay people I've seen!
Je ne comprend pas!
Another case, the opposite now. There is this guy who is not super-handsome but neither is he bad-looking. There is something very shy and modest about him that makes you like him. He hangs out mostly with girls. You don't see him flirting with guys. This all creates an impression of him being shy and well... not sleeping around.
WELL, HE DOES! He really does. Once our mutual friend was at a gay party with him. She asked him whether he slept with any of the guys in the room. He pointed at five. There were about nine people in the room.
His housemates are saying that nearly every morning some man emerges from his room, grabs a toast for a quick breakfast and then leaves the house. Never to return. Yet this guy still has this aura of modesty around him. If I didn't know, I would never tell he was promiscuous.
This seems strange to me. People are so different. We really should not assume anything with no evidence. Knowledge is power.
My next blog entry will be about 'gay issues' and how psychologically fucked up some boys are. Stay cool.
4 November 2009
